Me: I posted a thing! A story! I wonder if I have any hits!
Me: Don’t look. It doesn’t matter. Your story stands alone on its own merits whether or not anyone else likes it. What matters is that you trust yourself and your work.
Me: I wonder if I got kudos. Did I get a kudo? Is that the singular of kudos? Did I get one, yet? No! I have zero kudos! No one loves me! I’m awful!
Me: It’s been five minutes. The story is ten thousand words long. Give people longer than five minutes to read a ten thousand word story. Give people longer than five minutes to see that there has even been a story posted. Some people are at work. Some are asleep. Some are watching Orange is the New Black and eating corn chips. It’s okay if you don’t immediately get a kudos. Which is its singular form, though kudo as the singular is also an acceptable back formation.
Me: Everybody hates me.
Me: Jesus Christ.
Me: I’m awful. I’m going to go hide under the dinner table.
Me: It’s been six minutes. You need to give this shit time.