americans think ABSOLUTELY NOTHIN of driving 7 hours. they’ll drive 7 hours just for dinner. they’ll drive 7 hours just for chips and dip
Do your butts not get tired
After 12 hours in a car driving across three states, your ass is so numb that it could probably just fall off and you wouldn’t notice.
Tbh I would just get out around hour five and make a home in whatever layby I ended up in
@saxifraga-x-urbium Even weirder is that Americans are either two people: 1. Must never stop driving, not even to pee, just to cut like 15 minutes off of the estimated driving time 2. Get out every hour to see the sights even if you’re driving through absolute buttfuck nowhere
I got car sick just reading that
Same
I am that first type. It’s a problem when the family I’m seeing is a three-hour drive away. At least they know we’ll need to use the bathroom.
gordon ramsey: so what’s wrong with the restaurant? a staff member about to drag out every single bad and/or questionable thing their boss has ever done:
Imagine being an uber driver and while giving some teen and his uncle a ride you end up getting pulled into a hostage situation/anti government rebellion forces
Han Solo did not sign up for this
To be fair, in this metaphor, the uber driver is in trouble with the local mob boss because he was ferrying cocaine and dumped it out the window when it looked like he might get pulled over, so…
So the uber driver hooks up with the sister of the guy who first hires him, and it turns out that their dad is the Deputy Sheriff, and things go downhill even faster than previously imagined when they hit up a local truckstop for a bite to eat, fuel drop and impromptu family reunion.
Truckstop’s run by an old friend who he won his car off that one time, and the dude’s hitting on the chick he’s hooking up with and it’s like come on man, don’t do this to me but then the girl’s dad is there and he gets hit over the head and shoved into the trunk of the cop car and it’s like oh, shit. Fuck. Chewie man, don’t let them take my car!
And then the kid, who had never been off the farm before he hired you, comes back with Green Beret-level skills to bust you out of jail and his sister, who was honestly kinda preppy, straight up MURDERS the mob boss. And then you get the plans to the DOD’s biggest single piece of equipment so you go to the middle of nowhere where it’s being built and you have some trouble with the locals, but somehow the annoying nerd speaks their language and manages to impress them, so you work together to infiltrate the military base. Oh, and the kid lets himself get captured so he can talk to his dad, and after a knock-down drag-out fight, the dad realizes that he’s been played his entire adult life by the corrupt politician overseeing everything, so he chucks the politician down the maintenance shaft of said politician’s high-rise just before it gets destroyed by the rebels, led by your friend in your truck that he borrowed with the promise that he wouldn’t put a scratch on it, but he knocks off your side mirror getting out of there.
Inspired by #TheInternetNamesAnimals, I’ve compiled this helpful list of alternate names for the Doctor’s various incarnations. I haven’t gotten to the New Series Doctors yet, and I’m definitely open to revising this list, so feel free to add on your own suggestions.
