There most be some fangirls in Gotham ship Bruce Wayne/Batman.
I’m imagining the fanfic, and it is filling me with glee! “The billionaire playboy shrank back a little from the vigilante. ‘W-what are you doing?’ He couldn’t help noticing his heartbeat had picked up. Batman looked back at him, his gaze expressionless. ‘I’m here to save your life, Mr. Wayne.’”
Bruce probably started the trend.
“Where did this ship even COME FROM?”
“IDK, someone wrote a really popular fic about it two years ago and everyone got on board.”
“Yeah, wasn’t his username grandfatherclock or something like that…”
No, see, this is brilliant because it actually works, because their “personalities” are so opposite that this ship would really appeal. “You need to lighten up, Batman.” “You need to take things more seriously, Mr Wayne.” “When was the last time you had any fun?” “When was the last time you did anything else?”
3hr long arguments about whether the best way to reform Gotham is through the Wayne Foundation charities and rebuilding initiatives or taking down the mobs and crime families that secretly run the city.
At the end, Bruce uses his rich-boy skills to take down a few henchmen – “What, you think I’ve never swung a golf club before?” – and Batman lets himself reluctantly be convinced to go out for ice cream.
(They’ve headcanoned Batman as blond to fit the necessary slash pairing requirements)
The comments are all, “OMG, have you ever noticed how Batman always intervenes when something shady goes down with the Wayne Foundation? I mean, not that it’s like, out of character, foil Penguin’s plot to block a low-income housing proposal so he can put up another casino there, or whatever, he does that for everyone, but have you noticed that he’s involved every time it’s Wayne Foundation? OMG THEY ARE DATING IN REAL LIFE THIS IS TOTALLY CANON!”
It’s the most popular Real Person ship in Gotham.
(Robin: “You know like, half the internet is shipping you with yourself.” Bruce: “I am large, Tim. I contain multitudes.” smirk.)
in superman adventures #19, there’s a villain named multi-face who can convincingly disguise himself as anyone, even tricking dna tests and x-ray vision. Superman initially can’t stop him
and the only reason he gets caught is because multiface decides to disguise himself as, of all people, CLARK KENT i’m screaming
why do villains always mess up so badly
Clark Kent attending Bruce Wayne’s yacht party where Bruce told Clark to wear his clothes and……
Ta-Da!
Sard borken
calling the people at the party Bruce’s “fake friends” as if he’s Bruce’s only real friend and he’s low key jealous
Batman is cool and all, but how does Bruce Wayne treat his low wage workers
Pretty well, if I remember rightly.
I’m working off memory here, but he hires ex-cons and former sex-workers (giving one young woman a business card as Batman and telling her Wayne Industries was hiring receptionists), pays for his employees’ scholarships, hires people released from Arkham, made sure no employees were sacked when WI took over GothCorp after their CEO was fired, hired a bunch of homeless guys he met while undercover as a homeless guy (investigating the kidnapping of Gotham’s homeless, which turned out to be a slavery/human trafficking ring).
According to Wikipedia, his company is researching cures to HIV/AIDs and alternative fuel sources, if that helps any.
Excellent comment 10/10, good to know Batman is awesome
One of my favourite stories from the shows, was about a petty crook who ran from him and Robin, and they chased him into his apartment. Batman knocked him around a bit while the guy’s wife and son watched. Then Bruce gave him a job as a security guard at Wayne Tech.
I bet in the early days of the Justice League, when the original seven were still trying to work as a team, before any of the sidekicks came, before the Justice League became a giant extended family, the other members would occasionally forget that Batman was a father to a tiny, energetic little boy until they were forcibly reminded.
“I’m afraid we’re going to have to move the budget meeting this Saturday. Yes, I’m afraid something more important has come up. Dick is asking to go back to the Natural History museum for the 6th time this month. He likes the wooly mammoths, they remind him of elephants.”
“Yes I understand, Luthor’s plans need to be… Wait, can you hold on a second Clark?… Dick, I swear to God if you jump off that banister you may survive the fall but you will not survive me, do you understand? Yes, I thought so… Sorry, you were saying Superman?”
"Flash, act natural, pretend we are in a serious discussion and I am asking for your signature for very important League business and not because Dick has been begging for your autograph since he heard about you joining the team. Dammit Allen do not smile like that this is serious.“
“Get your mind out of the gutter Jordan, there’s a thunderstorm in Gotham and Dick’s stuffed animal was frightened of the lightening. Why else would he be in my bed at 4 in morning? More importantly, why are you calling at this hour causing my rightful cranky son to answer the phone?”
“You’re a magnificent warrior Wonder Woman but motherly you are not. You need to hold them properly, like this, to soothe their fears. Dick likes to be held after a nightmare, you just stroke their head, assure them that everything will be fine, perhaps rock them gently… genTLY DIANA.”
“Aquaman, do you have a moment? Dick’s been feeling a bit lonely at the manor, I’d like to get him a pet but with our busy schedules it needs to be something manageable. How the hell did you did ‘Tiger Shark’ out of ‘Manageable’? I just want a damn goldfish.“
“I don’t take your meaning Cyborg I am very clearly doing work here. Yes, that monitor in the corner is always running, it’s just security footage from the house. Yes, I check in to make sure Dick is still safe in bed and he hasn’t been kidnapped or started climbing the chimney again. No, I am not being overprotective, just wait until you have children Victor then talk to me.”
I AM SCREAMING THIS IS ONE OF THE GREATEST POSTS I’VE EVER SEEN
*aquaman telling Bruce that fish are very hard to care for animals, bowls are 10000% unacceptable, and not at all manageable for a small child. get him a dog for crap’s sake*
“Allen, I seem to have lost my son, who is small but incredibly fast. I cannot seem to outrun him. If you could go fetch, that would be much appreciated. Yes, I will purchase you a ‘flashmobile’ for the help, though I have no idea why you need it?”
“No Dick, that is not a clown, that is a man trying to kill me, please get off of his head. Joker no, he is not half-bat. It is the middle of the goddamn night, just give me back my son and we can go at it tomorrow. Dick, sticking your fingers in your kidnappers eyes is acceptable behavior this time only, you cannot try such with the Justice League. Flash has complained much. Now go to bed”
“Why would a giant monster popping out of the ocean surprise me, Diana? No, I have a son at home, there are literally no surprises left. If Dick find a way to use peanut butter to stick toy soldiers to the manor ceiling 20ft in the air, then an alien race can find a way to get on earth via fault lines”
“If the words ‘build me a giant robot’ come out of your mouth one more time, young man, Cyborg and I both are going to find a way to shut you up”
“Bruce, for the love of god why did you bring him with you to the meeting?” “Alfred is ill and do not even ask for the endless list of reasons no nanny will set foot in my house. Explosives may have been involved. Agencies have us flagged. Can we just get back to saving the world, please?”
“That mysterious weapon we got from the last mission? It’s in a secure storage facility outside of Gotham. Of COURSE it isn’t in the batcave, that’s attached to my house. What kind of parent do you think I am??”
“N-no that tracking chip is DEFINITELY not for Dick…. that ha, that would be…. that would be a tiny bit overprotective, wouldn’t it? no, no of course not….. shut up, Victor. Just give me the damn chip”
