Tag: chickens

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moggiepillar:

i can no longer take any description of a male protagonist seriously if the writer describes him as ‘brooding’

because i used to think ‘oh, that’s sexy and mysterious, etc’

and now i think of this

once you’ve been loudly cussed out by 2.5 lbs of feathers, that word only ever means one thing

This is the kinda brooding i WANNA see

#so this behavior basically translates to nonstop cuddling of offspring and vocal aggression towards anything that tries to prevent that #tbh i would be delighted to see male protagonists do just this sort of thing (via starfoozle)

I just had to explain what I was cackling at to my roommate. It automatically passes the Laugh Rule.

She found her reluctant fiance, Erstad, brooding out on the rainy moors. 

“Is that a baby rabbit?” she asked, observing his huddled form. 

“IT’S SIX BABY RABBITS AND YOU CAN’T TOUCH THEM,” replied Ernstad, contriving to look twice his usual size and at least three times his usual fierceness. 

“Whoah okay damn,” she said, and backed away. 

i’d read the gothic romance novel of ernstad and his baby rabbits like right now

This means that Batman, obsessive hoarder of orphans, is the only dark mysterious character that can be accurately described as “brooding”.

Don’t forget Wolverine! He’s got like six foster daughters by now. 

Excellent point, my man.

We will accept Batman and Wolverine as brooding heroes. All others will be required to complete an application process with supporting evidence.